When I drive, God talks to me. Not always, of course, and most often it's nothing profound. But I've found that if I make the space to hear, there's often something to listen to. So I tend to drive in silence; no radio, no CD, nothing. Just me and the possibility of God.
And it's when I decided to take a scenic drive through the back roads of Washington County as I was leaving my chiropractor's office this past Wednesday, enjoying the warmth of the sun coming through my moon roof and thinking that I should have put some sunscreen on before I left the house, that the directive to write a blog came to me. I have to be honest and tell you that I've thought about it before, but I knew that blogging meant a commitment, and I just wasn't prepared to make that commitment back then. (I also wasn't sure I had anything worth writing about that others would want to read!) So when I first heard: "You need to write a blog." I felt myself resist and push against it. I found myself coming up with every excuse I could think of to convince myself that I really couldn't do what I'd just heard I now need to do. (Sometimes I purposely drive with the radio on, just so I can't hear what God is trying to tell me!)
If you remember, it was my decision last Mother's Day to drive to Niagara Falls that lead me to a much longer drive to Alaska because during that drive, in the quiet spaces between ego's wanderings and the electronic voice of my GPS giving me directions, God said "You need to drive to Alaska." Interestingly enough, as I think back now, I never tried to talk myself out of that one!
I've spent the last few days since that message came to me just tossing the idea around. I actually took another drive on Thursday and went up to the cemetery in Hermitage , Pa, to put flowers on my mom's grave for Mother's Day. I find that I go there often, just because driving clears my mind and it's a destination to head to that doesn't require a great deal of thought and preparation. Also, there's a wonderful peaceful park there, Buhl Park, that has a fitness path that my mom used to frequent, and a path around the lake, Lake Julia, where there are swans and ducks to watch while sitting on the benches that have been thoughtfully provided.
I walked around the lake and eventually found myself sitting on one of those benches, feeling the sun warming my skin and again wishing I had sunscreen, as I thought more deeply about writing a blog. And before I knew it, or could stop myself, I heard myself say out loud: "Okay, God, I'll do it. I'm making a commitment to you right now that I will write a blog. You just better make sure you give me words to write that people will want to read." And as tears leaked slowly from the corners of my eyes, I took a quick look around to make sure there was no one around who had heard me!
I'm not sure what you'll find when you come here, if you come here at all, but I promise you I'll tell it like it is for me. I'll share my tears as well as my laughter, the mundane as well as the mystical (And there's much more mundane than mystical, I hope you know that!), my doubts as well as my faith, my failures as well as my successes ( Although if you know me, you know that I don't believe in failure, just that it was God's outcome for my choice rather than the outcome I envisioned.).
As I said at the end of the email when I shared with you that I wasn't moving to Nashville right now after all, I believe that since we're all connected, as I walk my path, you're walking with me, and what I experience impacts each of you also, in your own unique way, just as what you experience impacts me. So I will share my thoughts, my insights and any inspirations that come to me as I make the journey, hopeful they provide something helpful for your needs as well, and I look forward to hearing anything you might want to share about your own experiences that might help me or anyone else who joins us here. There's so much wisdom among us, and the more we share, the more easily we can all walk the paths before us.
Talk to you soon!
Bonnie
